…you own 22 pairs of nail clippers and 1,684 nail files…and they are scattered in every room in your home, every bag you own and every compartment of your car. You know they are there…somewhere…
…stairs are your mortal enemy.
…you have learned Zen and the Art of Not Flipping Jerky Drivers off on the Freeway…because, you know, your car has your phone number on it now.
…you know where the handicap accessible entrances are in every large building in your town.
…people in elevators have pointed at your table/cart and asked you why you brought a bed with you to the hotel.
…you’ve done a massage while someone held their dog/cat/infant daughter on their stomach for the entire session.
…you bring your massage table car shopping…and station wagons start looking like mighty fine rides.
…you get asked at least twice a week if you are creeped out by going to stranger’s houses.
…your other cup holder has been known to tote a backup bottle of massage oil.
…you’ve been amazed at how many people don’t know their own building number or gate code.
…you have come up with at least 4 alternative designs for your massage table cart, all while walking some distance with it. You’ve never fabricated any of them, but you can dream.
…you’ve had recurring dreams of being stuck in traffic while your poor client waits for you across town.
…when someone complains about how long it takes to drive somewhere, you bite your tongue and smile.
…you’ve ever forgotten your table cart, and the stretch of hotel from the parking area to the guest elevators might as well be the Sahara Desert.
…you carried it all the whole way anyway, and regretted it later.
…to you, your client’s cute yard ornaments look more like an obstacle course, complete with booby traps.
…and last but not least, though this might be a southwest LMT exclusive… you might be a mobile massage therapist if your massage table has ever gotten snagged on a cactus.
Thank you, and good night!
Please feel free to add more mobile massage specific ones below!